Why do squeaky floorboards always find me at 2 a.m., and how do I silence them for good?

Squeaky floorboards are most noticeable at 2 a.m. because the house is quiet and your senses are heightened, making even small sounds seem loud. Physically, floorboards often squeak because wood expands and contracts with changes in humidity and temperature throughout the day, causing the subfloor or floorboards to rub against each other or the nails holding them down.

To silence them, you first need to identify the source of the friction. Here are a few ways to tackle it:

• For wooden floors (the classic fix): If you have access to the joists from below (like in a basement or crawlspace), have someone walk on the floor while you listen from underneath. Once you locate the movement, you can tap a wooden shim coated in carpenter's glue into the gap between the joist and the subfloor. Do not force it, as this can lift the floor; just tap it in until it is snug.
• For carpeted floors: You can use a specialized "squeak repair kit." These kits include breakaway screws that you drive through the carpet and into the subfloor. Once the screw is deep enough, the head snaps off below the surface of the wood, securing the board to the joist without damaging the carpet or leaving visible screw heads.
• The quick DIY fix: If you can't access the underside or use a kit, a simple application of powdered graphite or talcum powder can sometimes work. Sprinkle the powder over the gaps between the boards and use a clean brush or a cloth to work it down into the cracks. The powder acts as a dry lubricant to stop the boards from rubbing together.

If the squeaking is coming from a very old, finished hardwood floor and you are nervous about damaging the finish, it is often best to consult a professional carpenter. They can pinpoint whether the issue is a loose board, a loose nail, or a structural gap that needs specific hardware to hold it tight.